Shut Up, Archimonde! You’re Not My Real Dad!
I’m pretty new to Kaldorei lore. I’m getting into the lore with my new druid, who just hit 85 (Run me through heroics, dammit!) and I’m interested in meeting other Kaldorei roleplayers. (Say hi to me ICly, ya ya?)
Sadly, when I am in Stormwind (Which is much of the time because Darnassus is so confusing in terms of banks and AHs and my guild RPs there), I usually find night elves like this.
Extremely tall night elf half Eredar in red armor that isn’t Mongraa? What has this world come to?!
Morning, Angle
I don’t know about everyone out there, but I certainly needed a nap after the appearance tab of this fellow. Now for the bio.
Click for the entire grand adventure
Nightmare Moon-whisper
Of course I’m gonna make the My Little Pony joke. Hope you liked it, because it’s the last bit of joy you’re going to have for a little while.
Click for the complete... thing.
“Fallen Archangle” Is that supposed to say Archangel, or is this some new rank thing? Have to be clearer and less obtuse.
Ruby Ruby Ruby Ruby
Do you shardmind if I take a moment of your time?
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Oh gee, geode.
Murdered When She was 17. Murdered When She was 17.
Lan here. I’ve been busy, working two jobs and all. It’s hard work, lemme tell you! I wish I could make money off this blog, but I don’t know how I would like to get paid. By the page view? By the comments?
This MRP is taller than she is.
No, I think I would make more by earning X amount per cliché.
What the Fel?!
Lanuria here! I’ve been gone for a while thanks to vacations and training for my second job, but things are settling down and I’m ready to get back to writing for your enjoyment!
My vacation was great, for those who care. My nephew, who is almost four, is turning into quite the little nerd. Maybe in a few years he will be getting his own computer, a WoW account and learning how to make a decent, lore following character.
Or he’ll turn into whatever the hell this is. I can only pray to the nerd gods above that this fate doesn’t befall my geeky little nephew.
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Why wouldn’t someone want to walk up and talk to someone with a roleplaying style of “Devious/Aggresive Full-Time”, sounds like a fun time to me. So does the “Race: Fel Orc” bit!
Ladies, Contain Your Orgasms
I beg of you, one at a time.
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How are we mortal fellows supposed to compete?
Good Characters Copy, Great Characters Steal
I can understand why some people use flowery prose when there are perfections like this running around.
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Did someone say Ashfire?
Pining for the Fjords
It’s like a good idea, except not.
Click to embiggen, but not quite enough - you may want to squint.
Thanks to Grashkah for the submission. You people really do keep us going.
Some of My Best Friends are Ugly Girls
She’s not just a piece of meat, people. She’s a big piece of muscle.
Click to Embiggen
We’ll start at the end: “(Go away lore whores, don’t care what you think.)” First of all, you never put a period at the end of a parenthetical. Just saying. Second, we’re not lore whores. That would imply we got paid. We’re lore sluts. Third, you may not care what we think, but I think we have a readership that does.
All Annadria, All the Time
Only fitting that a few weeks after I get into a Dark Sun game, this comes a-floating into my inbox, thanks to commenter Palindrome.
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“‘Lady’ ‘Half-breed’ ‘Vermin’ ‘Ranger’” Heart? Seriously, though, worst list of potential tramp stamps ever. Follow me past the break where we end up in “da” club getting our Moongrind on.
Dagny and Lacey
Gentlemen… behold!
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When the words are misspelled, at least you know they’re not abusing the thesaurus directly. Let’s take a look inside.
Call Varendil Dawnblade to the Stand
Varen here. For all the poor decisions represented here on the site, there’s one thing we haven’t yet featured: a goblin. Today, that streak ends… sort of.
Our first goblin on RPL and it isn’t even a real goblin.
Mommy and Daddy Issues
Lan here. You know, there are times we get submissions and I shouldn’t even read past the first screenshot, but morbid curiosity keeps me going.
Just let those two last names sink in for a moment. All nice and angry now? I know I am.
Thanks to Zara’beth of The Silver Twilight Society for the submission!
Argunon and On and On and On
I empathize somewhat with someone writing draenei history, because Blizzard seems content providing none of it, but making yourself the hero of everything isn’t really the best way to go about it.
Don’t you love it when people can’t follow simple directions?
Hopetakerawayer
It might be time that RPL’s little corner of the internet stopped hiding in its little corner.
I couldn't have said it better myself.
“King Elendïl Hopebringer.” Okay, just ignore this part for now, because believe it or not, everything good about this RSP happens in spite of this name.
You Have Failed Me for the Last Time, Starbreeze
Varendil here. Maybe I’m merely old and cantankerous but it doesn’t take a staggeringly stupid physical description to anger me anymore. Sometimes it doesn’t take much at all.
Go ahead, find the flaws in her character. I’ll wait.
Imperi-No!
Lan here, relieved to offer a death knight that isn’t a vampire.
You will read this.
Let’s play Count the Clichés! Are you ready?
Shampire
I’m weary of beginning at the beginning and ending at the end. Let’s Tarantino it a bit.
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“[[ PS: I DESTROYED the rules of Lore. ]]” Oh boy.
Girl I Must Warn You
I thought that when Cata dropped, everyone would forget about Darkfallen. They were a scourge among the Scourge and a bane of all of us who actually liked vampires before Twilight.
Mmm. David Boreanaz. So delicious.
Ah, but I’m getting off track and dizzy. Vampires! WoW! Two great things that go worse together.
I can understand not noticing your hair is getting a little grey in the back, but not noticing your skin is getting grey?
Be Cool
Like… I don’t even want to tear it apart. It’s all so obviously contradictory. The whining about good English, the complaint about godmoding…
Click to embiggen.
Okay. Here’s what we’ll do.
There’s Nothing More Attractive Than a Useless Helpless Girl, Right?
Varendil and I are back from our riffing vacation. The show was fabulous and if you ever get the chance to check out Cinematic Titanic in person, do it. Three hours of nonstop laughter. Now that we are back, though, it’s time to get to work.
FFA: I Saw a Werewolf Wearing a Toyota in East L.A.
Varendil and I are busy getting ready for our weekend adventure to see the original masters of making fun of bad things, Cinematic Titanic! Since we are going to be gone for the weekend enjoying the riffing styles of Joel, J. Elvis, Mary Jo, Trace, and Frank, we are going to let you guys in on the fun. Our subject this weekend is Locath Iron Fang, a worgen warrior.
- You must embiggen.
So, sound off in the comments with your jokes and don’t forget to give our friend here a little advice as well. We’ll be back next week!
Lanuria Dawnblade, a.k.a. Courtney Adler, aspires. She's an aspiring DM, aspiring photographer, and aspiring wife. She lives in Monroe, Wisconsin and complains about the weather far too much. She enjoys The Big Bang Theory and singing the songs from Glee.
Varendil Dawnblade, a.k.a. Taylor Vincent, is a 22-year old writer, student, World of Warcraft player, and 4th Edition DM. He lives in Monroe, Wisconsin with his fiancé and their jade plant, Esmeralda. He likes Douglas Adams and The Venture Bros. He hates Toni Morrison. Don't even ask. 
